The Sick boy Philosophy

Rents
Aug 31, 2016
5 min read

In 2017 one of my favourite films ever, Trainspotting, will be making a return to the big screens in the form of a sequel called Porno.

Part of me is excited, and part of me is fearful.

Despite the fact they have the original cast and Danny Boyle is back at the helm; I’m seriously concerned they’re going to fuck this up.

As a 20 something living in London in the mid 90’s Trainspotting was the culmination of everything cool. The soundtrack was, well, just listen to it.

The actors were fresh, hip, and their characters were outrageous.

Danny Boyle was an unknown quantity, He's done okay since though, Oscars, and choreographed an Olympic opening ceremony, FFS!

It’s fair to say that a story about a bunch of smack heads from Edinburgh launched a career or two.

Despite this dream team being back together, and the fact they’re basing the film on Irvine Welsh’s follow up book of the same name, I’m afraid. Like really afraid.

I mean, despite a few exceptions: The Godfather 2, Terminator 2, and Mad Max 2, sequels are a disaster and nothing more than production companies trying to cash in at the box office. I’ll be distraught if one of my favourite films gets butchered.

It got me thinking though about careers that should’ve ended while they were riding the wave of success.

Those that started with a big splash, only to come crashing back down to earth in a flaming ball of shit.

I think Sick Boy said it better than I ever could…

Here’s a few that “had it, then lost it.”

Acting

Robert DeNiro

It hurts me to write this, as DeNiro is one of, if not my favourite actor of all time.

From 1974’s Mean Streets, to 1991 when he revitalized the role of Max Caddy in Cape Fear, DeNiro was the Man! I mean how good is this list, Godfather Part 2, Taxi Driver, The Deer Hunter, Raging Bull, Once Upon a Time in America, Angel Heart, and Goodfellas. Forget about it!

He’s had his moments since then with Casino, Heat, and Ronin, but the rest I’m afraid, just pales in significance.

I mean I respect the man’s work ethic, he’s been in about 687 films since 1991, most of which are forgettable. If any of you are saying “what about, Meet the Fockers?” I’ll get Joe Pesci to stab you repeatedly with his mum’s bread knife in the boot of my car.

Special Mentions

Nicholas Cage

Director

Luc Besson

Starting with The Big Blue in 1988, a film about 2 free divers, Besson went on a run of 4 films that I absolutely loved.

Following The Big Blue, he directed La Femme Nikita, the story of a drugged out convicted felon, who instead of going to jail, is trained and turned into an assassin. Gritty as all hell, it kicked ass!

The Americans made a version called The Assassin, starring Bridget Fonda, which they didn’t completely butcher.

In 1994 the Frenchman directed Leon, another assassin story and his relationship with a young girl, played by Natalie Portman.

Leon, is in my top 10 films of all time, so yeah, I liked it.

Finally the stylish, sci-fi, The Fifth Element, finished the run and cemented Besson as one of my favourite directors.

The decline of Besson has been pretty stunning and made me consider taking him off my Xmas card list.

Writing and producing credits on films like; The Transporter, and the Taken trilogy, seems like a man going through the motions. Then directing The Family, and Lucy, he just hasn’t hit the heights of his early work.

In the words of my friend Sick Boy, “basically it’s just shite.”

Special Mentions

Francis Ford Coppola

Sports

Kobe Bryant

This one’s easy for me, as a long term Celtics fan I’ll take any opportunity to bag a Lakers player, especially Kobe.

But even a one eyed Boston fan can respect this guys basketball skills. He terrorized defenses, won 5 championships, has multiple scoring records, plus, the most selfish teammate of the year award. There was never any doubt about his athleticism, skills and desire to win. In his prime there were few better, and he’ll take his seat in the NBA Hall of Fame no doubt.

His last 2 seasons in the league though, well they were all about vanity and padding out that bank balance. He sauntered through those seasons either injured or reminding everyone how much the franchise and the fans owed him. The same people who paid for overpriced shoes, singlets and court side seats.

To be honest, he did make the Lakers franchise lots of money, but he made plenty himself, and last season the guy was nothing but a side show, which to be honest in Los Angeles is what it’s all about.

Special Mentions

Tiger Woods

Benji Marshall

Music

Snoop

He bolted out of the gate with Doggystyle – an amazing, neck snapping debut that was executive produced by a reinvigorated Dr Dre (coming right off the back of his own solo debut classic ‘The Chronic’) and a hungry Death Row roster which complemented Snoop perfectly.

Doggystyle still stands up sonically today, with any other hip-hop album, and as far as debut albums go in genre, it sits with 36 Chambers, Illmatic, The Score, Ready To Die.

Snoop was right there, in ’93, one of the biggest stars not just in hip-hop, but in the entire music universe. Then Death Row got ugly, Snoop stood on trial for murder, Dre left, and the Dogg’s sophomore follow up “Tha Doggfather” was left to other (incompetent) producers. The result was fans were left without the much loved & enjoyed combination of Snoop & Dre. and the whole G-Funk sound was missing. That musical union was pretty much abandoned until 1999 when Dre dropped “Chronic 2001” and they made magic again.

Snoop Lion anyone?

Special Mentions

Rolling Stones

To be honest, there’s just too many to mention.

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